Friday, January 30, 2009

Banned Super Bowl Ad

Friday Fun

Tri Towers Solitaire

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Best Complaint Letter

Here's a complaint letter to Virgin Atlantic:

The best complaint letter ever?

If your hand is bigger than your face, you have cancer

...Wack!

Now let's try this. If your ring finger is longer than your index finger, you are more likely to be successful.

Ring finger length linked to City stockbrokers' success, claim scientists

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Brushing Up on your MacGyver Skills

You broke the cork on your wine bottle, and now there are bits of cork in the wine. What to do? Pour the wine through a coffee filter. This and 80 other useful tidbits can be found here:

Extraordinary Uses for 16 Ordinary Household Items

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

69 Sexiest Rap Songs

Stick figures acting out explicit rap songs.



Monday, January 26, 2009

Joke of the Week

At 78 years of age, Wally married Anne, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Anne decides that after their wedding she and Wally should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together.

After the wedding festivities Anne prepares herself for bed and the expected "knock" on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Wally, her 78 year old groom, ready for action.

They unite as one. All goes well, Wally takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep.

After a few minutes, Anne hears another knock on her bedroom door. It's Wally. Again he is ready for more "action." Somewhat surprised, Anne consents for more coupling. When the newlyweds are done, Wally kisses his bride, bids her a fond goodnight and leaves.

She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it... Wally is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more action.

And, once again they enjoy each other, but as Wally gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, "I am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Wally."

Wally, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Anne and says, "You mean I was here already?"

Friday, January 23, 2009

Friday Fun

Ice Breaker
Help the Vikings break each other out of ice blocks

Bastard Tetris
You will never get the piece you want.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Bad restaurant reviews

Yes, that's right, I hate bad restaurant reviews. Of course I'm biased, because I review restaurants myself; but I can't stand people who review things and they have no clue what they are talking about. For instance, I am totally mystified by the individual who complained that the Shanghai buns at Shanghai Wonderful were "too juicy". TOO JUICY??? WTF??? That's the whole point of Shanghai buns. It's like saying that a burger is too "beefy" or a grilled cheese is too "cheesy". Pleeeeeease.... How about the individual who proclaimed that his hot and sour soup at Victoria Restaurant took too long since he "knows" that the soup is ready in the back. The waitress just merely needs to scoup it into his bowl. Hello moron, the soup is NOT ready in the back. Maybe at the diner you frequent or the "Manchu Wok" you eat at the food fair. But a classy restaurant like Victoria makes the soup fresh, since the veggies would be soggy otherwise. Oh and for the individual who complained that Posh Restaurant had only beef and pork for their all-u-can eat Sukiyaki... Dude, there is only beef in Sukiyaki! Getting pork is already a bonus! If you wanted seafood and other stuff, that's called at HOT POT and that's Chinese! So stop complaining! People! Don't talk smack if you don't even know the difference between a cocktail weiner and a roll of Mentos!

Vietnamese Playa

Monday, January 19, 2009

Joke of The Week

A city boy wanted to marry a country girl. She insists that he has to ask her father for her hand in marriage. So off he goes to their farm to ask her father.
"I want to marry your daughter."

"Well, my boy you will have to prove to me that you are a man worthy of my daughter."

"I'll do anything for my love," says the young man.

"You see that cow out in the pasture? Well, go screw it."

A little puzzled the boy says, "OK, anything for my love."

On his return of doing his deed, he asks, "Now can I marry your daughter?"

"Nope," says the father, "See that goat over yonder? Well, go screw it." Again the boy obliges.

A few minutes later he returns saying, "Now can I marry your daughter?"

"Nope. Not yet - just one more thing. See that pig in the sty? Well go do it, too." Once again he obliges and returns.

This time the farmer is amazed at seeing this boy doing these deeds just to marry his daughter. So the father finally tells the boy, "Now you can marry my daughter."

The boy replies, "Screw your daughter, how much you want for that pig?"

Friday, January 16, 2009

Friday Fun

Riddles

  1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?
  2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?
  3. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and gray when you throw it away?
  4. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday?
  5. This is an unusual paragraph.
I'm curious as to just how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so ordinary and plain that you would think nothing was wrong with it. In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is highly unusual though. Study it and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out. Try to do so without any coaching!







Answers
  1. The third room. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead. That one was easy, right?
  2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry.
  3. Charcoal, as it is used in barbecuing.
  4. Sure you can name three consecutive days, yesterday, today, and tomorrow!
  5. The letter E, which is the most common letter used in the English language, does not appear even once in the paragraph.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Mess with your mind without drugs

Boston.com lists a few things on how to mess with your perception without any drugs.



Now if you will excuse me, I need to get some ping pong balls and a radio.

Hack your brain

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Get it on

What's the deal with Nunchuks?

This is an awesome drawing of Seinfeld/Bruce Lee done by Brandon Bird.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Toys R Us Sign


Yep, you're going to save more than $0 on this item.


Being a Smart Consumer

You are shopping at Walmart and faced with the following prices for milk:

  • 2 gallons of milk for $5.00
  • 1 gallon of milk for $2.25
  • 1/2 a gallon of milk for $2.47

What would you do?

I would try to buy a bunch of 1 gallons on separate bills and try to return them at the 2 gallons for $5.00 price.

Walmart's Milk Pricing Strategy

Monday, January 12, 2009

Joke of The Week

Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching TV and drinking a beer when he hears a knock at the door. When he opens it, he is confronted by a little Chinese man, clutching a clip board and yelling, "You Sign! You sign!"

Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts. Nelson is standing there in complete amazement, when the Chinese man starts to yell louder, "You Sign! You sign!"

Nelson says to him, "Look, you've obviously got the wrong man", and shuts the door in his face.

The next day he hears a knock at the door again. When he opens it, the little Chinese man is back with a huge truck of brake pads. He thrusts his clipboard under Nelson's nose, yelling, "You sign! You sign!"

Mr Mandela is getting a bit annoyed by now, so he pushes the little Chinese man back, shouting: "Look, go away! You've got the wrong man. I don't want them!" Then he slams the door in his face again.

The following day, Nelson is resting, and late in the afternoon, he hears a knock on the door again. On opening the door, there is the same little Chinese man thrusting a clipboard under his nose, shouting, "You sign! You sign!"

Behind him are TWO very large trucks full of car parts. This time Nelson loses his temper completely, he picks up the little man by his shirt front and yells at him: "Look, I don't want these! Do you understand? You must have the wrong name! Who do you want to give these to?"

The little Chinese man looks very puzzled, consults his clipboard, and says, in the best Chinese accent ever, "You not Nissan Main Deala?"