Bring Back The Club

Remember about 10 years ago? Everyone had The Club and/or a dashboard protector (cleverly sold with an image of a sunglass) for their car. Doesn't matter what kind of car you had. BMW? Club. Ford Bronco? Visor. Chevette? Club and a visor! Everywhere you looked, there was The Club.

These days though, with alarm systems and immobilzers being commonplace, we've seen a sharp decline in the use of The Club and dashboard protectors. With no alarm or immobilzer to call my own, but wanting to ensure a secured and moderately warm car, I feel kind of left in a lurch, sacrificing a certain amount of sophistication for savings and automotive security.

Tough part is, what am I to do on a date? Slip the valet a fiver, covertly pass along the sunglass dash protector and carefully, yet firmly instruct, "now this little key here..." Should that go unnoticed by the date, am I to drop her off at her house, follow the invite upstairs with the distinctive clicking lock of The Club?

It's a fine balancing act being a single, cheap and paranoid man. I say, let's all get back on equal footing - bring back The Club!