Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Where has the Mackinaw Peach Gone?

Where am I going with this? Well, it’s another Skytrain “incident” and for those of you keeping track, yes, it’s two straight Skytrain blogs, but really, I ride the train twice a day. Short of airing office gossip and regaling you with tales of my sleeping and eating patterns, the Skytrain is a pretty interesting part of my life – a window into everyday Vancouver, if you will.

Setting is once again the Skytrain…it was a mild March afternoon, to my surprise; it wasn’t an overly crowded day. In fact, it was downright spacious. As usual, I’m minding my own business. However, I have a habit of taking a quick inventory of my surroundings whenever I enter a train. I’m told it’s a good idea for safety reasons. One can never be too sure on the train.

On this day, all seems normal - except for this one dude. And no, it’s not a scary thing or even a gross thing. There’s this guy in dark plastic sunglasses and denim jacket - pretty non-descript. (But really, as a rule of thumb, watch out for those in denim jackets – worse yet denim vests). Only thing was he was gnoshing on a cucumber.

I’ve never seen that. Apples, oranges, pears, even the odd mackinaw peach…but I’ve never seen whole vegetables snacked upon, nevermind a cucumber. Again, I can accept mushrooms, green peppers, or even celery sticks but who snacks on a whole raw cucumber – on public transit? Do that behind closed doors. To make matters worse, behind those sunglasses, I don’t know if he’s staring at me, but it sure looks like he is. Staring straight ahead with a blank look and a cucumber.

Call it homophobia. Call it paranoia. I just felt a bit awkward with all that cucumbering (if that’s a word). Fortunate for my Lachanophobia (fear of vegetables, for the uninitiated, and a potential future blog), my stop was next. I make a hasty retreat and dash home – back to the familiar embrace of my kitchen and trusted Mackinaw peach. It’s in season, you know.

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